Hi there- and welcome to the Bitter Net Cafe.

Don't try to turn around, friend, I'm not feeling that visible today. But you can ask some questions, if you want.

>Where are we?

Every internet cafe I visited in my life leads into this space- and leads out to wherever you wandered by. You might catch Australia, Indonesia, Malaysia or Thailand on the wind through the door.

>What is this place?

An homage to all the internet cafes I would get a scant half-hour or so at- there's a trail of my early forays into the internet, marked by the IP addresses of newly-made neopets accounts, and a string of searches for 'ghost story', 'spooky story', 'scary story'- I had a theme, and a bad memory for passwords. Not much has changed, really.

>Who are you?

A young old salt. I earned three swallow tattoos by the time I was twelve. I sent emails by HF radio, was guarded over by a klabautermann, slept on desert island beaches- survived storms and tsunamis, and far more besides. Believe it as you like, it doesn't affect my experience of it.

you can call me bitter, or salt.